Note to self

Hello people!

I have a new habit now. And that is, writing the draft of the post in my iPad, before deciding whether to share it or not. Fyi, I have another draft on another page, but I decided to complete this draft first. :relaxe

I shall never use this blog as a medium to rant on anyone/anything and I shall never particularly point
out anybody's unethical/ill-mannered acts.
And that is a promise to myself.
Quoting from David Kirsch, 'The worst promise you can break is the one you make to yourself'. Bear that in mind, okay?

With that being said, I wanted to write about my emotional reflex -of yesterday's event. This is purely because letting it out is way better than keeping it in, and I don't want to risk me turning into an 'unrecognisable monster' due to the vain attempt of keeping it all in.

And of course, this time around, you can always skip this post, as I am writing this for future me hehe.
And if ever you've had a slightest doubt about whether 'the future me' will ever come and reread the blog posts, push those doubts away! I am not shy in announcing that I love reading and rereading my blog posts, all the time! (I did just that yesterday night). And I definitely love walking down my memory lane, as a way of distracting and entertaining myself! There's nothing wrong with me right? I mean, I am just a writer who loves her own writing 🤣

Let's get back to my main point.

As a reflex of yesterday's drama, I was quite surprised at first. And I don't deny feeling a lil bit angry/annoyed because of the false claims. But looking back at the false claims, it was most probably because that person is too stressed of his/her current workload. But I don't mean to say that I agree with him/her. Being at home may sound like we've got all the time we have in the world. And that's probably true for some of us. And also true for me, but not all the time. Assuming us having more time than you, doesn't make sense at all.

Logically thinking, do I have 28 hours now per day compared to you? Our responsibilities are different
now. And it's not fair to say, that you know completely how our days look like, or, to even say that you did that because you are confused. I mean, come on! Don't be ridiculous.

I am not in a position to say that you are wrong or damn right, but one(many) thing(s) I know for sure is to:

- never do silly things out of mere emotions

(be it anger, annoyance or envy)

- never voice out your inappropriate comments
(because you can never take back your words, and you don't want these minute things to haunt you for life)
(words can be sharper than knife, sounds right?)
- never assume you understand/know completely about someone else's lives
(but to live yours to the fullest)

And the most important thing would be, why make enemies when we can remain friends?
Even if you can't feel the sparks now (and I don't even want to discuss why did this happened in the first place) why pick a fight when we can remain strangers?

ft a happy me :)
dengan doa semoga terus kuat, positif dan happy!

New Year Q&A

I wish my friends can do this too :)  And I'll do it again 10 years later, just to compare hehe. See you later, 34 years old me 👋 InsyaAllah.

 

1: What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before?

Stay at home with my family for the longest time, even when I am still a university student.

 

2: Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I never had new year's resolution. I am definitely a true INFJ haha.

 

3: Did anyone close to you give birth?

No. But both of my sisters are currently pregnant. Do pray for them okay?

 

4: Did anyone close to you die?

No. But death rates d/t COVID-19 kept reminding me that mine is always getting nearer, never further.

 

5: What countries did you visit?

Spain, Portugal and Morocco. Alhamdulillah. 

6: What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020

Diligence, perseverance and determination.

 

7: What dates from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I don't do dates. I'm bad with numbers, really. But I can never forget the day of the repatriation flight in May 2020.

 

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Getting better at being Ciklin to my beloved nieces and nephews?

 

9: What was your biggest failure?

Not able to have only 6 hrs of sleep to consider that I had enough sleep.

10: Did you suffer illness or injury?

Alhamdulillah, no. 

11: What was the best thing you bought?

Cerave Moisturising Cream! It saved my life!

12: Whose behaviour merited celebration?

My family and friends.

13: Whose behaviour made you appalled?

Idk

14: Where did most of your money go?

Shopee and Foodpanda.

15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Any good news from my uni.

16: What song will always remind you of 2020?

Any ballad songs will do haha.

17: Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?

Happier(?), maintaining the same weight as before the pandemic and poorer of course.

18: What do you wish you’d done more of?

Sewing and studying.

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?

Sleeping.

20: How did you spend Christmas?

I don't celebrate Christmas. I only celebrate Umar's birthday on Christmas hehe.

21: Did you fall in love in 2020?

With myself, and even more than before.

22: What was your favourite TV program?
Reply 1988 - so many life lessons learnt and very very well portrayed.

 

23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I guess so.

24: What was the best book you read?

Seteguh Gunung Fuji Berdiri by Ustaz Hariri!

25: What was your greatest musical discovery?
I'll not answer this.

 

26: What did you want and get?
Going back home alhamdulillah.

 

27: What did you want and not get?
Elective in any government hospitals or KK.

 

28: What was your favourite film of this year?
Hmm, can't recall a good movie. But I definitely love watching documentaries on Netflix. Those are some good stuffs, and informative too!

 

29: What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More time with my family. I can never have the same chance again.

 

30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020?
Stay at home fashion. You do you.

 

31: What kept you sane? 
Family, friends and keeping myself updated with current news.

 

32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
DG Hisham! One of  a kind! Subhanallah.

 

33: What political issue stirred you the most?
Every political issue. 

 

34: Who did you miss?
Patients.

 

35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020.
Life is a mess, but not to the ones who have faith in Him.

 

36: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year
I love singing, but quoting a song lyric? I'll leave the question as it is hehe.

Assalamualaikum.

 

The Recap of My 2020

Well, hello people!!!

Hehe assalamualaikum to you. Before all else, let me tell you something. Actually, I do have all the time in the world, as I am currently on holiday (haha) and the small kids who love attention are not here at the moment. Though usually I have to think hard to come up with a content, this time around, the overflow of ideas is no joke. I do have a few topics to be shared with you, my beloved readers, but whether I am able to write and post about them is a totally different story hehe.

So, for this post I wanted to share about the recap of an awesome (read: quite awful) year of 2020. Let's join the hype! (I know I'm late, but who cares haha)

The intention of me sharing this post is just to remind myself that 2020 has happened. And alhamdulillah you and me are out of it alive and most likely still in one piece! I am not going to indoctrinate you by saying the opposite, because I believe that saying/writing something repeatedly, will soon make you believe that you should do/feel that 'something'. Thus, I am just going to say it out loud, that my post is gonna be interesting hehe. Do read it, be benefited from it and may it inspires you to write yours too 😉

And if you're new to this blog, if ever you are, I am a picture-oriented person. And to be fair to the topic of the post, I am going to go through my Picture folder and start with the ones taken in 1.1.2020 

Disclaimer: I only pay attention to grammar and writings of the post excluding the captions (I always do this). So, I apologize if the captions make you feel uncomfortable as it is going to be Manglish/ 'rojak'.

January

surprisingly, my 2020 started with a short trip to BLR,
with my beloved roomates alhamdulillah

ingat sume benda kena discuss haha

sedapnya sushiii

oh and sebenarnya nak sambut birthday
kakak manis sorang nii

naik lif zaman bila ntah, manual la yang pasti

sume orang sedikit blur and amazed,
jadi pakcik terpaksa tolong masuk lif & gerakkan ahah

📸 Nabihah

pastu makan lagi

ni samudra night, with Husna

ni legend, tq engku hehe

January story doesn't end here. Obviously, because the pandemic had not affected India yet.

went for hiking somewhere in Belgaum,
lol didn't even know the destination

learnt riding for countless time,
tapi tak berani juga haha

excuse ma face,
this was with kak syaza during cfcs.
cfcs pun tak dapat habiskan huhu

During those rare times I wished to play futsal
and actually went for it haha.

sempat join charity program 

Hahah this one.
Remember I told you once, that one of the weirdest things I did
during 2020 is getting a gym membership ahha.
And this was the whole gym members who went for hiking.

Dah penat hiking, pi cari makan la.
The scrumptious puree only in Ramdev.

To make it simpler, I grouped the Andalus trip in February hehe. Eventhough the trip started in Jan, it ended in February, so yeah.

February

The Andalus trip was one of the proofs that 2020 wasn't a total mess huhu. Alhamdulillah. Even if the majority of 2020 had me crying and a lil bit at loss, Allah surely rewarded me with sth I've never imagined to be able to experience, like ever. Alhamdulillah for this. And I apologise if the pictures are the ones I've shared before. Anyways, enjoyyy 

those happy faces

was able to witness the beauty of
this fairytale-like castle in Lisbon

pose acah-acah nasyid sikit 

macam Venice but in Seville

this was the sky that welcomed our arrival in Morocco

the colours of life

the mosque by the sea of Casablanca

and was able to attend the hectic classes and the ability to de-stress with food
without having to worry about viruses, alhamdulillah for the ni'mah

March

dapat visit kak biah lepas operation

dapat sambut hari kelahiran sahabat

dapat whatsapp dari bihah hahaah
sebab dia pinjam tudung lol

dapat cilpi lepas kelas or during breaks 

dapat attend majlis nina :))) 
virtually la hheheh

dapat attend OT was a blessing, 
walaupun selalunya blur dgn procedure operation huhu

dapat solat with these bunch,also a blessing.
abaikan la background tu.
klu background tu terlalu kemas, gambar ni mungkin takde haha

April

bulan ni ada gambar nanas yg sy potong cantik2 je haha.
maybe i was too occupied with things.

May

This month also was a huge blessing for me. Alhamdulillah, even at this point, I can say that I've never regretted my decision and I thank Allah for allowing me to make such a decision. Indeed, He gave me what I need most and not what I merely want.

the relief I felt was beyond any description

and the memory of the frontliners who were so hardworking and helpful,
insyaAllah I'll never forget and be thankful for

the stay was lonely but was nothing compared to
the struggle of the superheroes (read: frontliners)

woke up everyday to online classes, back to back hehe.
ENT gais hehe

Sambut raya alone was a thing hehe, 
Not complaining of course, it was more than what I could ask for

sempat sekelas dgn idola also is a blessing

dapat la bake roti sekali, hitam pun hitam lah

dapat kad raya besar punya dgn ucapan
paling ikhlas drpd maryam comeyy

dapat braid rambut anak kesayanganku

And wallahi, I never knew it could be this long. Shall I continue? Hell yeah ;)

June

dapat ziarah inche boss 

ada rezeki makan pulut durian

get to attend mr wong's retirement ceremony,
virtually of course

July

get to celebrate for the first time (I dah 23 tapi baru reti nak sambut),
anniversary mama dan abah

dapat depa dua ni jadi tetamu kehormat hehe

August

get to attend tinah's wedding ceremony!!
dan dapat jumpa kinahhh

the bride and groom are cutee

one with le bride

September

got to spend more time with fatimah and the siblings

cilpi lagi sama anak ini

get to attend faiz's wedding
(this surely needs another detailed post huhu)

iffah and ummi

ada rezeki ziarah yana kat ganu for a few times,
and the wonderful beaches are just captivating

dapat gi jupe budok due ni

And I get to consult dermatologist in HTJ, and alhamdulillah I think I am quite okay now. Not that itchy and not that red anymore (syukurrr).

October

an extreme sport this one.
korang prnah tak setup pool ni?
mak aii makcik boleh buat kalau rajin je

get to spend more and more time with these cuties

and receiving special random letters from yam

at ganu ft the most adorable couple

and the ultimate selfie of 3 anok bongsu

November

jadikan maryam model shawl

supo ummi dio

pastu cuba buat churros, that turned out like cekodok cair

Made origami as requested to avoid getting this comment :
'Ciklin, bosan lah, nak buat apa ni?'

saat umar bulat2 tiru kakak dia buat apa,
nak ikat rambut pun hmm

December

My favourite month!

selpie nge iffah comeyy

finished my first travelog book! bapak best,
I'm inspired to write one too!!!

precious selfie with eomma

wefie by the beach again hehe

And finally, we're at the end of this recap thingy, alhamdulillah. 🎉

Can you guys guess how much time I spent on writing this simple post? Initially, I didn't expect it to require such effort and time 🤯. I started writing at around 3 pm yesterday, and finishing it at 1.10 am the next day (with breaks for solat, eating and all). In other words, (for future me), if you try to focus on all the blessings and all the good things, you wouldn't believe how small those unpleasant things are. It's just that when you're too caught up with the bad things, you tend to forget all the nice thing that you may not have prayed for, but is actually meeting your exact needs. 

Thank you Allah for never giving up on me and thank you for always staying by my side. May 2021 be filled with us loving You more and more, insyaAllah 💖. Till then ;)